08/03/2024
Stupid smile of mine, one might think from those stuck in their cars watching me. They would think, – What a coward this man is, standing on his motorcycle enduring the traffic jam, instead of weaving through us, poor us!, wretched, forced to wait, doomed to judge.
I was really very dizzy to look out at the world again, I had descended into the abyss through the cloud of the Enigma of God, I had recognized myself as His son and had ordered myself, prostrating in worship and praise, I had even offered the sacrifice of my Idol which through tears I discovered had been myself, my flesh and my lust. I offered myself as a sacrifice to receive in return the Freedom of His Love for me, of His Love as Father, of His Love as Son and finally!, with me and in me, of His Love as Spouse. How could I want to stop feeling such bliss? How could I block out the noise of the world, of Barajas, of El Prat, to not keep feeling it?
Faced with so much anxiety, I stopped and returned to my headphones, forgotten all weekend, to loop Pluma de Escribano, it will undoubtedly remain anchored in me forever, in the memory of our wedding Lord, in the Kiss and the Embrace. Every note, every intonation of every word of every verse of the Psalm speaks to me and invites me to stop in You. This is how He speaks to me – You have loved justice and hated wickedness;
therefore, the Lord, your God, has anointed you with the oil of gladness above your companions. – If He has chosen me, if I am His beloved son and He delights in me, what do I care what they think of the stupid smile on my face!, if I cannot control it, it comes from my guts and I want to enjoy it as much as I can, even standing on my motorcycle surrounded by the noise of turbines, gray smoke, horns and tar even there, I can feel the gentle breeze of my God, the Creator of My Smile. There I enjoy it giving thanks for the enormous fortune of finding my family in Hakuna and my home in Cifuentes.
